Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Venting...
For 2 nights in a row I hear a doorbell about 1AM, it startles me from my sleep...there is no one at the door by the time I get there. Now I don't know if I am just dreaming about the doorbell or is someone really ringing it?
Today I feel really-really depressed, I feel like I do not matter to anyone, that people would like to sit me out on the curb and let the garbage truck take me away...then they wouldn't have to even think about me anymore. I do not bother anyone or ask for help...I do not want to be a burden...I try to be cheerful and not tell anyone my fears and anxieties... still that is not enough.
All day it's been hard to focus on anything...and I cried to often...about nothing. I read that keeping a blog and saying what is on your mind helps...well, I'll give it a try. When your on the bottom there is only one way to go....up....right?
Today I feel really-really depressed, I feel like I do not matter to anyone, that people would like to sit me out on the curb and let the garbage truck take me away...then they wouldn't have to even think about me anymore. I do not bother anyone or ask for help...I do not want to be a burden...I try to be cheerful and not tell anyone my fears and anxieties... still that is not enough.
All day it's been hard to focus on anything...and I cried to often...about nothing. I read that keeping a blog and saying what is on your mind helps...well, I'll give it a try. When your on the bottom there is only one way to go....up....right?
# posted by sunflower @ 2:38 PM 
