Nothing 4 Nothing

Everyone I know has problems today..big ones...so it is not only me. Maybe it's the way of May? And J is mad at everyone and everything, even the dog. I feel so sleepy right now and it is only 6:30pm...I have to stay awake to watch "24" Phoned R today and R said that "Al and Carol just left"..I asked "Al and Carol...do I know them" R replied "they are your cousins" I had to laugh, they completely slipped my mind, or what mind I still have left. I don't see them very often...it is sad that when Al is in town he never calls or asks about me, to him I am a nobody I don't exist. After all these years I have come to accept his attitude...but I always liked my cousin Al and wish we could have been friends, it isn't as if I haven't tried. I started writing chapter 4 this weekend after saying I would give it up, I just can't stop, I feel so good when I write and love the illusional world I created...